It’s been 1 month+ since the engagement.
Yesterday, as I sat with Cheryl in her apartment, I talked with her about flowers, colors, chair covers, and action stations. Numbers and dollar signs flew around and I found myself looking up places and terms that I didn’t even know existed 3 weeks ago. There was a moment, over dinner and over conversation, that I paused for a second and looked at her and thought, ‘Whoa, this is the girl I’m going to marry!’
It’s a crazy thought – something I remember talking about years and years ago, when Cheryl and I were still just friends. I was at the WWII memorial one summer night, talking it up with Ann Belara, a great sister and co-missionary. She was engaged at the time, so I asked her a slew of questions, “How do you just get married? How do you spend the rest of your life with the same person? What if you don’t have money, then how do you pay for it?” And I remember she told me with a laugh and a smile, “It sounds cliche, but you just know. And when you know, you just do it.” Then she related it to all of our great victories as missionaries. “It’s like Go 4 Gold and going on mission – blind faith. You just have to trust and jump in.”
Years and years later, I caught up online with another great sister, Annie Alamo. And she was asking when I was thinking of proposing. And I laughed and said, “I want to, but I’m broke! I don’t know if I’m ready…” And she assured me and told me that you’re never really ready. There’s never going to be enough money.
I took that home and really thought about that. I knew that I loved Cheryl and that our relationship had matured to the point where we were ready to take the next step. Four years of mission work really hurt financially, that is the honest truth. But what we lost financially, we gained spiritually and personally. And what started out as raw emotion, has now matured into something beautiful and pleasing to the Lord.
That night at Rockefeller as I got down on one knee, I told Cheryl that I know we don’t have much money and we have so many things to work on still, both personally and financially, but let’s work on them together. (Or at least that’s what I said in my head!)
I’m starting to learn, that that’s what marriage is about. That I shouldn’t wait until I’m perfect and have everything perfect. That in fact, on this earth, I will never be perfect. I will only be perfect when I am with Jesus in heaven. Marriage is but another step in the journey. A big step yes, but it is not the end goal – heaven is. And now I get to set out on this journey together with the girl of my dreams! How blessed am I!
So that’s it for now. I’ll write more about the actual day sometime later. I know I promised all my loyal Biters a post-engagement entry for over a month, so here it is. For all of the love and prayers and support, thank you! We will need them as the date gets closer. Everything right now is exciting. Conference planning really helps when talking to vendors (I’m even looking up prices on Par64s!). But I know stressful times will come and I’ll need all my Biters real close.
Thank you all again for your loyalty! Now we can get back to our regular nonsense blogging schedule. And don’t forget, we’re getting closer to our 200th commenter and guest blogger! Happy love day everyone!
